In the past, Mrs. Ibukun Awoniyi is the one who comes up with excuses just to avoid having sex with her husband of nine years, but today, she is the one chasing him for sex.
Since her husband lost his job in the bank over a year ago, their sex life has nosedived. He doesn’t feel like bonding with her sexually like he did previously. She had even suspected he might be cheating on her at one point.
Mrs. Awoniyi is not happy about it. She spoke to her husband about the situation many times, but things remained the same. The development is causing friction in their marriage. It’s like her husband doesn’t desire her anymore. She is at crossroads.
On his part, Mr. Gbenga Awoniyi blames the economic situation in the country for his low libido. “Living under the harsh economy is not funny anymore. I can’t be thinking of having sex when I cannot provide for my family like used to do,” complained Awoniyi said.
A businessman, Mr. Theophilus Igwemba, also admitted to Saturday Sun that the biting economic recession in the country had affected his sex life.
“Now, my thoughts have shifted to what to eat, how I am going to get customers who will pay and not owe, rather than thinking of sex. It’s obvious that things are not easy right now. The economy is so tough now,” he laments.
Dr. Gabriel Omonaiye says that in human beings, sex is under the control of the nervous system, endocrine gland and the emotional state. Derangement in one or more of these can spell havoc to the libido and the ability to have an adequate sex life.
“This is very true for men. Actually a big chunk of men with reduced libido and erectile dysfunction is due to emotional problems,” he explains.
“One of the greatest emotional disturbances that a man can ever encounter is to be financially handicapped, especially for those that were previously stable money wise.
To be in recession financially is a sex dampener for most reasonable men. It is a big blow at the core of their manliness,” declares Omonaiye, adding that to most men, not being able to meet up the financial demands leads to loss of self esteem, stress, anger, loss of appetite and resentment, which can culminate in loss of libido.
He said: “The cerebral and limbic system inputs into the libido are reduced by job loss, reduced financial income. The emotional stress associated with recession is known to reduce the male hormone, testosterone, which plays a significant role in male sexuality including libido.”
Doctors believe some special diet can help boost such men’s libido and enhance their sex lives. Dr. Philip Onyema recommend eating fruits like bananas, avocados and apples, considered libido-boosting foods or aphrodisiacs. Onyema says that “these foods also provide important vitamins and minerals that can increase blood flow to the genitals and promote a healthy sex life.”
In addition, dates are a highly-strengthening food and possess the ability to restore sexual drive, increase endurance and improve overall vitality, while promoting a good state of mind. According to Onyema, eating one date daily every morning as it is useful in combating low libido and sexual debility, even chronic fatigue.”
Onions and garlic are known to be effective aphrodisiacs and one of the best libido enhancers. “Mix one tablespoon of onion juice with one teaspoon of fresh ginger juice and consume twice daily,” he advises.
Another thing men can do to improve their libido is take time to meditate and relieve stress. Onyema notes that no matter how healthy a man is, being stressed out is going to affect his sex drive. To relieve stress, men should participate in sports activities or exercise. Those with a hectic lifestyle don’t always have the time to get the right amount of sleep. Being busy also makes it difficult to make time for sex.
Dr. Onyema advises men to boost their energy and sex drive by taking naps when they can and eating a healthy diet high in protein and low in carbohydrates.
Consult a doctor
Even if you are taking a natural approach to boosting your sex drive, it still might be a good idea to talk with your doctor. Doctors can help you identify underlying problems and suggest some strategies for enhancing sexual health. These may include communicating with your partner, making healthy lifestyle choices, and treating underlying medical conditions. Knowing the root of the problem affecting your sex life will make it easier to find a solution.
The situation is no respecter of class. Even the middle and low income earners, who despite their poverty, find sex the natural means of relaxation, explaining the high rate of breeding among them are singing similar song. A plumber, Gbenga Ayobami, says that Nigeria’s terrible economic situation has badly affected every aspect of his life, including his libido. According to him, not having money would impair the libido of even the healthiest and most virile man, if he is a right thinking Nigerian on the street.
“Most times, my mind is just blank and not on sex at all. My wife and I are concerned about how to pay our children’s school fees now, and not sex,” he says.
Ayobami notes that sex and high libido have to do with the state of the mind, expressing hope that the current ‘terrible’ situation gets better soon for his limp libido to start rising again.
An importer Mr. Nonso Chukwuka, says that not being able to cater for his family has reduced his sex drive. “It is only when a couple eats to satisfaction that they would remember sex. I personally have not been doing too well in bed.”
For David Ibeneme, when serious hardship hits a man, sex is the last thing on the mind, while most times, his thoughts roam without any bearing. “When you are in a nasty mood, you will not have the urge for sex. I don’t even think about sex anymore.”
Peter Minimah also agrees. He says: . My wife and I didn’t plan for the child we had last year which has worsened our case.” While Minimah still tries to fulfil his conjugal rights with his wife of nine years, things are definitely not steamy down there. “How do you expect me to perform in bed with this nasty situation on ground, he asked?”
Mr. John Ajao says: “My wife won’t even allow me if I think of it. I have not given her money for housekeeping for over three months now. The only language she understands is money for feeding. I only remember to have sex when I want to ease tension. I have reduced my love making session to once in two weeks.”
As it were the dire economic hardship in the country has reached a point that many Nigerian men don’t have time for the bed again. They are weighed down because they cannot perform their obligations at home again and this has reduced love-making sessions in many homes and even relationships.
Psychological explanation
Stress and tiredness caused by recession combined with same old boring sex put a dampener on love lives, a research revealed.
More than a quarter of people surveyed said they were making love less than they were a year ago, with women citing tiredness and men blaming their lack of libido on money worries.
And with many people working longer hours and juggling jobs and childcare, sex was no longer a priority, according to researcher Linda Kelsey.
Counsellor Paula Hall says it was not surprising that financial worries were the main cause of men’s lack of interest in sex, adding: “When we are stressed our bodies produced stress hormones which can affect libido very negatively. Men have up to 40 times more testosterone than women, which gives them a much more urgent sex drive which carries them through physical tiredness”
Miss Hall adds that there were several reasons why women were twice as likely as men to be too tired for sex, stressing: “It doesn’t necessarily mean that women are more tired than men, but environmental factors like tiredness and mood have more effect on women’s sex drive.”
Medical Explanation
Dr. Gabriel Omonaiye says that in human beings, sex is under the control of the nervous system, endocrine gland and the emotional state. Derangement in one or more of these can spell havoc to the libido and the ability to have an adequate sex life.
“This is very true for men. Actually a big chunk of men with reduced libido and erectile dysfunction is due to emotional problems,” he explains.
“One of the greatest emotional disturbances that a man can ever encounter is to be financially handicapped, especially for those that were previously stable money wise.
To be in recession financially is a sex dampener for most reasonable men. It is a big blow at the core of their manliness,” declares Omonaiye, adding that to most men, not being able to meet up the financial demands leads to loss of self esteem, stress, anger, loss of appetite and resentment, which can culminate in loss of libido.
He said: “The cerebral and limbic system inputs into the libido are reduced by job loss, reduced financial income. The emotional stress associated with recession is known to reduce the male hormone, testosterone, which plays a significant role in male sexuality including libido.”
Doctors believe some special diet can help boost such men’s libido and enhance their sex lives. Dr. Philip Onyema recommend eating fruits like bananas, avocados and apples, considered libido-boosting foods or aphrodisiacs. Onyema says that “these foods also provide important vitamins and minerals that can increase blood flow to the genitals and promote a healthy sex life.”
In addition, dates are a highly-strengthening food and possess the ability to restore sexual drive, increase endurance and improve overall vitality, while promoting a good state of mind. According to Onyema, eating one date daily every morning as it is useful in combating low libido and sexual debility, even chronic fatigue.”
Onions and garlic are known to be effective aphrodisiacs and one of the best libido enhancers. “Mix one tablespoon of onion juice with one teaspoon of fresh ginger juice and consume twice daily,” he advises.
Another thing men can do to improve their libido is take time to meditate and relieve stress. Onyema notes that no matter how healthy a man is, being stressed out is going to affect his sex drive. To relieve stress, men should participate in sports activities or exercise. Those with a hectic lifestyle don’t always have the time to get the right amount of sleep. Being busy also makes it difficult to make time for sex.
Dr. Onyema advises men to boost their energy and sex drive by taking naps when they can and eating a healthy diet high in protein and low in carbohydrates.
Consult a doctor
Even if you are taking a natural approach to boosting your sex drive, it still might be a good idea to talk with your doctor. Doctors can help you identify underlying problems and suggest some strategies for enhancing sexual health. These may include communicating with your partner, making healthy lifestyle choices, and treating underlying medical conditions. Knowing the root of the problem affecting your sex life will make it easier to find a solution.
SOURCE : SUN
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